Children
A reflective post...

This Christmas was pretty hard on all of us (Tina, Jaime and myself). Tif wasn't home this year. Her and Brian went out to his mom's. Jaime was crying off and on all Christmas Eve day, sobbed that night, and starting crying once when she opened one of Tif's presents. Tif wasn't home the year before last (without this effect)... so what made this year so much harder?

I think it was a combination of Tif not being home... and realizing that Jaime is getting close to leaving too. Tif's leaving kind of snuck up on me. I knew she was getting older, I knew she would leave home eventually... but I didn't fully appreciate the impact. With her gone, I'm well aware of it. I think we all are. So I think it wasn't just Tif not being her, but it was that along with the realization that Jaime may only be home one more Christmas.

Its really weird, but I think about it quite often. Jaime is the kind of person that really doesn't like people staring at her... and she'll frequently catching me just looking at her and say "What!" - "Nothing... I'm just looking at you".

Jacque and I ran into a store yesterday (I was picking up a couple more sushi plates and she was getting something for Bobby's birthday.) She mentioned that Bobby and David were over at CBC registering for classes and she couldn't believe he was 18. "Yeah... I know. I can't believe how old Jaime is either." We both started to choke up... said, "OK... well see ya later" and walked off. I feel kind of old... like a grown up or something, writting that. When you first have kids it is hard to believe that you'll ever have these kind of feelings and that they'll leave home. That is something "way down the road" - but here it is. Faster than you think.

I am so thankful for my kids. I have been lucky to really become good friends with both of them in their later teen years. Not just a parent, but friends. Jaime and I go to the movies together, listen to some of the same bands, go out to eat. At this point in my life (and her life) the time we have together is precious. I just realize how fast she is growing up, and how soon she'll be leaving the nest. And I cherish the time we have left. I know it is sometimes hard on her, as she doesn't like to be smothered and has a VERY ACTIVE social life. Which is very cool. She does a lot at church and hangs out with her friends a lot. Tina and I try to balance our desire for her to be home with her need to be with friends. She is just so cool that everyone wants to be with her. ;-) So... she probably doesn't get to do EVERYTHING she'd like to, but all in all I think we share her pretty well.

Anyway... kind of rambling (hey... its 5:30 AM - what do you expect?). Really all I wanted to say was how great she is. How much I enjoy her. How much I'm going to miss her (even though she won't be gone for at least another year and a half), and that if you have kids... enjoy your time with them. As everyone always says (and as I have learned), they grown up way faster than you think.